How to Decrease New Baby Stress

If you are a new parent, you know the answer to the question “Are you stressed?”Parenthood can be incredibly joyful, but it is also demanding and stressful for every parent. The good news is there are ways to help you handle the very real stresses of parenting.

New Baby, New Priorities

Maybe you used to prioritize keeping the kitchen spotless and taking a long walk after dinner every day. Now taking care of your baby and yourself means new priorities.Think about what is most important and what you can let go of.

• Walk after dinner? Don’t give up getting exercise. Bring your baby with you. Both of you will benefit from being outside and an evening stroll may even help your baby sleep better.
• Relax your standards. Your kitchen doesn’t have to be spotless, but it can be “reasonable.” For now, some dishes in the sink and some not put away are good enough.

Prioritize your time too.

• Baby napping? Get some needed sleep yourself.
• Can’t sleep while your baby’s asleep? Do a few needed chores, but also take the time to rest – look at a magazine, listen to music, meditate.

Say Yes

You can relieve some stress, by saying yes to offers of help.Family, friends, neighbors might love to hold your baby or take her for a walk. You can get a break or do errands.Some people may not have time (or inclination) to spend time with your baby, but they are more than happy to bring a home cooked meal (or takeout) or pick up a few things for you at the supermarket.Family and friends who are far away can help too! Gift certificates to diaper services or food delivery services, with a choice of restaurants, can help lessen the demands of your day.If your friend volunteers to fold your laundry or load your dishwasher, you may need to give up on your "right" way. The clothes will be folded and the dishes will get clean.

Sometimes well-intentioned people want to see the new baby or help in ways that are not helpful. Perhaps they show up at a time your child generally naps and you are able to get some down time. Instead, your baby is overstimulated and you are making coffee for guests. Set limits on visitors. Be clear and kind about what’s helpful and what’s not. People who really want to help will understand.

Connectivity

Make sure you have time for adult relationships.

• Spend time with your spouse or partner. A quick “check in” or hug can do wonders. Make time for intimacy. Arrange for a date night and limit talking about the baby to a few minutes!

• Stay connected with friends. Meeting in person is great, but sometimes even a quick text can be helpful.
  • Connecting with friends is even more essential if you are a single parent. You need adult time!

• Try a video chat with those far away who can provide support. This is particularly important for military families who are separated.

• Join a parenting group, a playgroup, or find online parent chats.

Basic Self-Care

It’s hard to take care of yourself when caring for your baby, but  experienced parents will tell you it’s harder when you don’t take care of yourself. When you are tired or hungry or lonely,  it’s easier to let stress get to you.

• Eat healthy

  Have easy to grab snacks around like carrot sticks and fruit. If you can afford it, have take out on occasion. Get pre-made mixes of frozen or fresh cut vegetables that you can easily add a protein to for dinner.

• Exercise body and mind

  Your spouse up with the baby this morning? Take ten minutes to meditate, stretch, run up and down the stairs, or read that article you’ve been waiting to look at.

• Rest

  Take the opportunity to rest when you can. Sleep when your baby does. Don’t always do chores when someone is with your child – take some needed down time too. Ten minutes of rest here or there can make a difference.

• Emotional Health

  Being a new parent creates all sorts of emotions. You might be overcome with joy that your baby smiled, then saddened that you can’t go out with friends tonight, and then worried you are not that “perfect parent.”  High-running emotions are pretty normal for almost every new parent. Remember to take time to laugh.

Make sure if you are feeling depressed or anxious and not able to handle the stress and changes of having a new baby, seek help. It’s quite common for both moms and dads to feel this way and it’s very treatable. Talk with a healthcare professional about your feelings or check out WellMama, a local nonprofit that provides pregnancy and postpartum mental health support services to women and their families.

Make Stress Less

A new baby is stressful for all parents, but you can handle the stress.  And give yourself a break!  This is a big life change!  Perfection is an unattainable goal.Consider new priorities. Adjust your schedule and your standards. Ask for and accept help. Lots of people love being around your sweet baby and love helping, but remember to set limits for visits. Take care of your adult relationships and of yourself too – not only will you benefit, but it will help you be a better parent. Parenting is a marathon and you want to go the distance.  Managing your stress will help you be more available to your infant and relationship!Sharing this post on Facebook is one way to connect up with friends and family and other parents looking for ways to lessen stress. This article is brought to you by Parenting Now! Parenting Educators and authors, Tova Stabin, Claire Davis and Lynne Swartz and consultant Jay Thompson (andupdatemywebsite.com).  Parenting Now! is passionate about happy, healthy families. For more information about Parenting Now! please visit their website (https://parentingnow.org/) or contact us at info@parentingnow.org

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